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July 16, 2021

Confidence Hacks: Daily Habits that Can Help You Build the Strength to Speak Your Mind

Speaking up for yourself may be one of the most intimidating things for you to do, especially if you are a lifelong people-pleaser or pushover. You may be used to keeping the peace, avoiding confrontation at all costs, and allowing others to have their opinion while keeping yours hidden. This will only cause you frustration in the long run, however, because you aren’t being honest with yourself or anyone else about how you really feel. The good news is, speaking your mind doesn’t have to be difficult or scary. Here are some daily confidence boosters you can adopt that will have you speaking your mind in no time. 

Prep Yourself

When you’re not used to speaking up, being prepped and completely sure of what you want to say ahead of time is key to your success. Try writing down all of your thoughts and practice what and how you’re going to say them. Really visualize who you are speaking to. If it helps, try standing in front of a mirror where you can check out your body language, facial expression as you speak, and hand gestures, etc. When that moment of truth arrives, you’ll be fully prepared to speak your mind with confidence and certainty. 

Positive Self-talk

Building the confidence to speak your mind starts from within. 

Get in the habit of being fully aware of how you speak to yourself throughout the day. Is it mostly negative chatter in your head? Do you criticize and berate yourself for every little mistake? If you find that most of the things you say to yourself are negative, make every effort to flip the switch to positivity and self-love. You may not be able to completely shut off those thoughts right at first, but by simply being aware you can place yourself on a more confident path that will have you freely sharing your opinions and ideas with anyone who will listen. 

Identify Your Insecurities

One of the best things you can do to get over your fear of speaking up is to figure out why you’re afraid in the first place. Dig deep and ask yourself the hard questions like, “What am I ashamed of or embarrassed by? Why am I so fearful of letting others know how I feel?” Make a list of all your insecurities and worst-case scenarios. By doing this, you are bringing to light all the things that are holding you back. This won’t make all your insecurities disappear immediately, but it will give you a starting point to begin pushing past them. 

Take Responsibility

A great way to boost your confidence is to remind yourself what you want and need, and then take responsibility for that. As pushovers, we often let others have the spotlight and neglect the things that make us truly happy. Stop doing that. It’s going to be so much easier to speak up with confidence when you believe your wants and needs are just as important as everyone else’s. The benefit of letting others know what’s on your mind will far outweigh the discomfort of standing center stage. 


Speaking your mind doesn’t have to be an overwhelming, stressful task. These are just a few confidence boosters that will have you accepting the spotlight and sharing how you feel without a second thought. 

Not sure if you struggle with standing up for yourself? Take the “Are you a pushover?” quiz! Click here to take the quiz.

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Dr. Monique Belton


Executive Coach and Clinical Psychologist, Monique Belton, Ph.D. helps empower people to create their dreams.

Dr. Monique Belton

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